Well, I went down yonder in guitar land
Lived 2 cats named Dave and Sam
I wants ta tell ya
Ah, the gig was rough and tough as Dave and Sam would strut their stuff

EVH had ‘em scared to death
When he walked by, they all held their breath
He’s an angry man, sure enough
And then Ed got G. Cherone, and Dave and Sam found other stuff

Ex Van Halen Singers outta luck now
Front man life done ‘em in somehow
They’re the guys EVH used to hold dear
Now the future of VH is not so clear
Once Strong and Mighty I declare
‘Til Ed told ‘em all “Get outta here!”

Ex Van Halen Singers moved on out the door (No, no, no)
Sam’s in Chickenfoot, Dave’s hopin’ for more (Yes he is)
Well he used to go out drinkin’, talkin’ and walking tall
Now he sits in silence waiting for that call
Ex Van Halen Singers you guys did it all

Aw, what about Gary?

(Clarinet Solo)

And Mikey?

Whoo!
I likes that, yeah (“Yeah,” say I)

Ah, y-well, Ex Van Halen Singers don’t worry anymore (No, they don’t)
What the hell – it’s a soap opera tour (Yes it is)
Well they used to hit the stage and do it right
Sam got a new band, Dave flies a kite

Ex Van Halen Singers get it done somehow (Doin’ the Chickenfoot)
Ex Van Halen Singers get it done somehow (Waitin’ for that call!)
Ex Van Halen Singers get it done somehow

Cherone!
Yeah!